Sunday, August 29, 2010

On being late and endings.

I was a couple of days late. So I did a test. As you do. A line. A shockingly "there" line. That was last week.

Then the niggling premenstrual taunts began a few days later. A stab of pain here. A creep of an ache there. For three days now, I have wondered, which of these moments would bring the beginning of *that* familiar colour? And, just as they do at the beginning of all pregnancies, each one has so far amounted to nothing. A rising and passing of pain.

In a successful pregnancy, this is stretching of the uterus and surrounding body bits. This pain/awareness happens as a matter of biological course.

In someone like me, who is on Ride #14, it readies me. Prepares me for the most likely imminent conclusion. Of course, we have done this many times before. The most recent time was this past January, quite similar to how it has happened this time, I must say. I count my blessings today as I did then. And the two times before that. Thank God for Lolly.

Today, we are packed and ready to head out the door for the day. Fun times with my little family of three (plus one, out there somewhere, far away today). I am prepared for The Colour. The line has gone, I tested again today. Pad is in place in my underpants.

I am prepared and ready. Must remember to pack the heat pack.

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