It's dissin' time

Oooooooh-kay.

Anybody, anyone at all, if you can explain to me how it is asseptable for one adult (that'd be him) in this house to make major and expensive out-of-budget unnecessary purchases and then be scolding and derogatory towards the other adult (that'd be me) when they make a decision with regard to curtain furnishings..... I'd like to hear from you.

WHY does every dollar and receipt I rack up get scrutinised? Why is it, after "That's nice" or "That's good", that the second thing he asks is "How much was it?" Sure, I don't contribute nearly as much anymore to the combined income. But, by jove, I did for the first ten years! Considering we've only been living together for 15, uhhh, that means I've put in a great deal too even though I mightn't have for the past four (with great reason, I might add). And it's not like I don't earn now.

This. Shits. Me.

And I believe it's where the seat of the "stay at home parents are worth more than this much *insert latest ludicrous amount here*" argument lies. I don't want money. I want a bit of recognition that, yes, whilst lovely and fulfilling and all the flouncy stuff, it's farken hard to live looking at the saaaaaame things - especially when unfinished or botch jobs, etc. - day after day and not want to fix them so that you feel better about being in that space you spend so much freakin' time in. When your home is also your work space (some of it), this just compounds it. Me, I need a neat and clear work area. Otherwise, my mind feels very cluttered and I find it difficult to get started (and then find it hard to concentrate, with my mind constantly off to one side going 'I need to get this done so I can move that out of the way so we can get to those...').

In a renovators' dream/nightmare/bane of existence, it's all multiplied by a bajillion.

So, buddy, don't you scoff at me and make me feel the size of a pea when I spend money on something that is actually adding value to the place (instead of being just a very expensive and unnecessary toy like a widescreen plasma tv - I don't care how much they've come down in price), as well as looking nice, of higher quality and well made. I don't want to look at something that will be used every day - ie. the window furnishings - and say "wish we'd spent a bit extra to get something that looks half decent". If I went by a man's rule of thumb, it's better to spend money on something worth half the price and then replace them - thereby spending the same amount - to get them replaced when they look shoddy in a couple of years' time....... Ahh..... Does anyone see the major flaw in this theory I've just been haughtily given? That at the end of five years or so, we'll have an inferior product needing replacing for the second time? And we all know that wouldn't happen and the house-bound stay of the two of us would be seething every time she tries to close blinds that now don't hang properly. Hmmmm...

I just do not understand how he doesn't understand and still wants to defend his position, to boot.

EUUUUUGH. Bloody main bread winners. Sorry. I assume I will look at this in a month and say "Get off yer high horse, you twerp". But right now, all I am is a little bit of pissed, as evidenced by the amount of italicising going on in this post.

In the meantime, if anyone has any contributions to this steam-blow, please feel free to rant and make sense (or none, whichever) in the comments. They might just add a bit of weight to my explanation. And, hell yeah, I want to be able to point to the screen when I read them out to him and go "SEE????? It's not just me." (It's ... not just me, is it?)