Monday, November 16, 2009

Don't Touch!!

What was meant to be a couple of hours' of craft fun with the LGBB, making little snow angel decorations, has turned into a weekend-long pilgrimage. Nay, a "quest for fun." Just wash my mouth out with soap and call me Clarke Griswold right about now.



I feel like the father who spent all that time on his kid's science project, in a scene from The Simpsons' ep "Duffless"...
Chuck: {Can I touch it?}
Dad: {I've worked too long and hard on this for you to
screw it up now.}
Chuck: {But it's got my name on it.}
Dad: {Just stand over there!
[kid walks off screen]
Over there!}

I know exactly how the guy feels. Seriously! I've been pushed to the brink by glitter. Glitter, of all things!

They do look very cute, though. And Lolly is strutting around like she did every cut, every painstaking fold. She helped put glue on the wings, dipping the unglued parts of them in glitter (how do they do that?? miss the blobs of glue and put glitter on all the unglued parts so that there's no glitter on anything when you dry it?) and then asked, "Can I eat the glitter off my fingers?"

Awww, yeah.... coochy-coo. Now move out of the way, Toots.

Steve had to make dinner tonight just so I could finish the second angel and be done with her. It would have been fine, as a little project, if I had read all the instructions carefully. Little did I realise, but they were not as meticulous about the hair, face, arms or legs as they were about how to fold, cut and assemble the dress, body and wings. I had to freestyle it and, thank God for the perfectionist in me, I wasn't driven to drawing out several versions til I got it right. No, I hacked up a coupla bits of paper and slaved over the damn things (with the LGBB jumping all over me and hugging me so tight I thought my jugular might snap at one point - she loves it when I get down on the floor), then slapped on the glue and said, "There y'are!"



The LGBB paraded them over to her Dad who made the obligatory (and just as well) "oooh's" and "aaah's", then she proudly brought them back.... and chucked them at me before flitting off to play with something else that had taken her fancy.

I absolutely dread getting involved in any of her creative school projects. I know what I'm going to be like. Chuck's dad. Fer sher *grimace*

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