Sunday, June 28, 2009

The long and short of it

I turned three again yesterday. Says so by the number of candles on the cake (shuddup!). The LGBB made it with her Nana and Pa, who stayed with her for a couple of days while we weren't here. And she couldn't wait until Saturday to do The Big Reveal of the cake, so I got it on Friday night when we arrived home.

Steve and I went away to a place down the Great Ocean Road called Apollo Bay. We stayed at Chocolate Gannets. I think I want to move there. I'd certainly love to steal their view.

The unit we stayed in was one of four. It had a separate spa room that was flanked by a double-sided fireplace, which we lit up after a relaxing stroll through the town. We brought dinner back, watched a bit of telly while we ate, read in peaceful, luxurious silence, chatted, laughed our asses off. When it got late, we turned off all the lights and then hopped in the spa. And oh my God... all the stars in the sky came out. We could see galaxies inside the Milky Way. Millions of stars. It was phenomenal, least of all because we were sitting in this amazing space that felt so indulgent yet was so simple. You never really realise how many stars are in the sky and how bright they are, if you live anywhere near a city or built-up area. I felt rather intimidated and very small in relation to the sheer expanse of it. Reminded me there's a whole other universe just out there.

I struggled there and back in the car. My back is, even now, still biting. But I had another massage yesterday which eased it even more. I am dealing with a years-long aggravation here that just had too much and finally snapped. It happens. The time away didn't leave me much of a chance to relax my back - the only time I am not in pain is flat on my back on the floor - but I did get some time at dawn, early the next morning before we left, to work through a couple of healing procedures. The main thing I received from it (I won't bore with the details of how and what it involves, but it was on the Green - heart - Ray) was that I "get in the way". Given that my main focus of working to the bottom of this current back issue relates to a father-daughter issue (collective consciousness speaking, not just me and my Dad or Steve and the LGBB, I hasten to clarify), I daresay that one-liner delivered to me was eluding to my "getting in the way" of Steve and his interactions (good or disciplinary) with the LGBB. Something for me to continue to work on and think about and watch.

I sat by myself and enjoyed the sunrise over the ocean. It was, quite simply, breathtaking. And then, while we were relaxing after breakfast, with the TV on to play one of the obligatory crappy holiday getaway place CD's you inevitably always find in these places, Steve was looking at the screen and suddenly exclaimed, "Michael Jackson's dead!"

I can't actually describe why it is that I feel so sad about this. I am not a fan. Although I will hasten to say that I adore The Jackson 5's music. Hell, with all that heartache they apparently went through, I think we owe it to them to keep enjoying it. It is sad, how tortured the guy was. But man, what talent. Genius. He sort of lost me by the time he did Black Or White. But certainly, all his early 80's stuff is so foot-tapping! I think the thing for me is, his songs were always there. There was so much airplay when I was growing up. Music is such a constant. A real "soundtrack of our lives". So when someone who makes popular music dies, I feel saddened - it's going to be different, hearing his songs now and knowing he's gone, which is weird because it's not like I ever think about him (or anyone much) whose music I listen to. It's the same with The Beatles, John Lennon's solo music and even The Mama's and the Papa's. I find myself thinking about the lost members of groups when I listen to their music.

So. Anyway. We had a great time away. Much needed and couldn't have come soon enough. It was a joint 10th wedding anniversary (belated) and birthday present-ish extravagance, the likes of which we don't often give ourselves. But we have vowed to continue to make time, throughout the endless weeks, to spend time alone. Together. It is a must.

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