Thursday, March 12, 2009

Tough new work laws

I've been in negotiations allllll afternoon over the strict new work rules put in place here recently.

*vision of calm and poise, folding washing doefully* "Yes, sweetpea?"
"You get a jellybean when you do wees on the toilet."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! Want-JEL-BANE!" (she thinks the faster she says it, the more likely it is to slip by me and I'll agree to it without realising)

See, the rule used to be, if you sit on the toilet you can have a jellybean. If you do anything whilst on the toilet (as in, use it how it was intended "anything", not like make a macramé pot holder "anything"). We ditched the whole reward system for sitting on the toilet after less than a fortnight, over a month ago, because it quickly went from something to be feared to something to get a quick sugar fix. Nuh-uh, Toots, we're onto that one.

Now, the rule is, no jellybean until there's evidence by way of something hitting water in the bowl. Obviously, we're explaining it in simple terms for the LGBB's sake. But basically, that's the upshot.

On and on and on it's gone this afternoon. The LGBB had a nap this arvo - it's become a staple in her day again, blessed are we! - and on waking, she was dry. No time like the present, thought I. So off to the toily for a sit and contemplate it was.

I could fold washing in the laundry all afternoon, against the backdrop of a wildly irascible toddler doing her best from her loo-perch to negotiate a new deal. It's funny how when I know for sure what Steve's and my decision is, I can stick to it no problems. I get no instant stress sweat on my top lip, no twitch in my shoulder blades (the seat of my stress, where I hold it all - lucky moi!).

It's only when I feel unsure about my decision - more accurately, about whether I can emotionally scar my child for the decision I make, given her gutteral wails of protest that render me slightly unnerved that perhaps denying her a second biscuit or not letting her lick the sole of a shoe to get my attention was not a good parental decision - that I get flustered and lose my nerve. Of steel.

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