Tuesday, March 1, 2011

It's me or the mullet

I swear, I have uttered those words to my truly beloved. At the end of 1992, Steve could put his hair in his mouth. It unnerved me.

It also explained why his cute little cat, Rusty, loved burying his head in my hair for the rest of his life - he had been raised since he was a kitten by Steve and would curl up in the crook of Steve's neck, under the mullet verandah, and think warm kitteny-mewy thoughts, no doubt. Once he was a long, slender cat (he was beautiful, was our Russell - a brilliant white short-haired boy with patches of deep orange on his head and his back), it was a tad strange but still cute that he would come and seek out my thick mane to take a kip on. Or in. Not so cute was when he began drooling in his old age and that, sadly for Russ, was when I declared his hair-bed days well and truly over.

There were several things that had to go once I came along. One was the Cinderella 'Night Moves' album (it's a heavy metal thing - what is it with boys/computer geeks and heavy rock bands??). Another was the mullet. And despite all accusations to the contrary by him, I did not throw out Steve's Guns 'n' Roses 1987 tour t-shirt. Mind you, if I'd found the manky, ripped-up thing during my adjudication of his wardrobe, it would have been toast. But no. It wasn't me. My rule was always, "You can wear this around the house, but try and set foot out that door wearing your Motley Crue t-shirt and we are over." I drew a hard line in the sand.

I tried to tell him that I knew what was best for him...... and luckily for me, he willingly obliged without telling me I was a bitch for not appreciating his "lived-in" look. But that missing bloody Gunners t-shirt nearly tore us apart for a while there (years 1993 through 1998, to be exact) and it is STILL brought up every so often by him to this day, in a thinly-veiled accusatory tone that makes me very impressed by his passion for the tee... not the band, just the tee, I have NO idea why - maybe an ex-girlfriend gave it to him?? Maybe Axel kissed it for him??? Who knows.

Luckily for me, Steve decided it was worth cutting his hair short to have me stick around. And the added bonus for him was, he could see again without having the world's longest man-child fringe in his eyes.

But we were always destined to be. When we joined our two CD/record collections, we had doubles of far too many Kylie Minogue albums and also two too many Phil Collins Face Values for it not to be (at least musical) fate pushing us together.

Have you given your betrothed any ultimatums of a style/clothing/musical taste, etc., sense? Have they thrown down the gauntlet to you about anything you do or wear or listen to? Spill! But you know, obviously only if it's not going to cause you too much distress, revisiting how you had to give up your Wa Wa Nee collection.

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